I wasn’t going to talk about this experience but since the angels decided to channel the message above, I will. It is a little more mystical than my usual practical adventures.
Last week I wrote about the dark night of the soul that I passed through last year in order to encourage those of you who have gone through this or are going through it. Take heart if you are there. The illusions within us must die before we can be reborn into the greater truth of who we are. I had an experience this week of surrendering to that greater truth and it was bliss.
After a long day of office work, I went out for a late afternoon hike in the desert. There were relatively few people on the trail, and the sun was getting low on the horizon. The wildflowers were closing up for the evening, curling in upon themselves as if they could grasp and hold close the sunlight they had absorbed during the day. There was a light breeze in the air that stirred up the fragrance of the desert weeds and flowers, creating an earthy perfume. I soon lost myself in the wonder of the beauty all around me. My mind went still. My body felt at-One with the landscape, and I felt the bliss I usually feel in that meditative state of being. All was profoundly still and silent both within and outside of me.
A rich, resonant, deep voice in my mind shocked me as it spoke to me and through me. “I AM,” it boomed out and I lost myself in that presence. “I AM,” it said again and I knew myself, Ann, as one expression of this magnificent presence. “I AM,” it said as it looked out through my eyes at the landscape and acknowledged that everything in view and beyond was part of it’s loving presence as well.
I slipped into an experience beyond words. I knew myself as a person here upon the earth and at the same time it was as if I also knew myself as part of this presence that was so large, so loving, and so all encompassing that there was nothing outside of it. As Ann I felt euphoria in the ‘arms’ of this presence, and yet ‘arms’ isn’t the right word because this presence was the thing that animated me, breathed me into life, and moved my body along this hiking trail. As Ann I felt like a limp little puppet being moved and animated and brought to life. This presence was to me as I am to my own hand. It moved me. I was one with it, part of it, and surrendered to it.
At the same time from another perspective, I felt God’s profound love for me-as-Ann… it was as if God was looking at a piece of art He was creating and saying, “Oh how beautiful” and yet everything else in the landscape was God’s creation too. I felt his satisfaction and love for everything and everyone, all at the same time.
Another hiker passed by. As usual, I said, “Hello” but the word pierced the stillness so loudly inside of me that it almost surprised me. That simple, “Hello” originated from a depth of love in this presence, that as Ann, I could barely comprehend. That “hello” was a greeting from God through me, to God in the other. It was “Namaste,” “Aloha,” “I Am/We Are” all rolled into one. As Ann I wondered if the other hiker had a clue about the love that was being offered there, through a simple greeting. And suddenly as I experienced myself as separate from this other person, I started to walk on my own again. But I remembered a little. As Ann I could look around still and see the presence of God shining through everything. But a minute before, when I was still lost in the mystery, the presence not just shining through everything.. it WAS everything, including me!
If you haven’t already had this type of experience and you want to, pray for it. It is life changing. The more of these experiences I have, the more I know myself to be more than Ann; the more I feel the love of I AM flowing through me to those whom I serve; the more I see the presence of God in the eyes of those around me; and the more my world is filled with the wonder and glory of God expressing himself in so many forms in the diversity of life on earth. The more I feel this the more I realize that there is nothing I have to do to earn love because I am that. It is only my job to get my ‘small self’ to surrender to the ‘greater self’ and to allow this love to flow through me. In that reality, I want for nothing, because everything we seek is really us seeking the truth of God’s love in one form or another. I can still have my human desires but they’re just fun ways to create and express and experience this love. I do not feel lack.
This is mystical and yet it is practical because living in truth feels really good 🙂 When you feel the presence of God’s love in your life you know why the angels love to love. They know and experience God breathing life into them, and through them to all of us. We can allow for this love to flow into our lives, and then do the same for one another as well. We are the hands, the eyes, and the hearts that God uses to express his love into our world. What a joyous form of surrender!
Leave A Comment