You be you, let others be themselves too

So many have come to me saddened, angry, and confused about how to deal with the intense anger and disagreements on the planet right now. It seems at times, that we’re watching a world that seems to be at war in a million different ways. Our weather has been affected. Our climate has been affected. Our cities and families have been affected.

Some days, peace on earth seems like a distant dream. Nonetheless, there are billions of souls living quietly with peace, tolerance, love, and kindness as their creed.

There are people who have lost loved ones in shootings or terrorist attacks who refuse to propagate hate. There are little children demonstrating interracial love and acceptance, whose videos go viral. There are people of diverse political views coming together to solve environmental problems rather than hollering about who caused them. There are coworkers helping coworkers in need. There are people quietly praying for countless souls they’ll never meet. There is so much good in this world.

Peace comes, one soul at a time. Tolerance comes one choice at a time. Loving the diversity comes by appreciating those moments when we see something we like that is different from our norm, and by appreciating those moments when learn more clearly what we want, by seeing what we don’t.

I no longer obsess over what I don’t want to see in the world. I witness it and use it to clarify what I do want. I see storms, and focus on the peace which mitigates storms. I see hate and focus on love which empowers love. I have friends who create political “wars” with “words” and I listen politely, striving to learn a more balanced view of reality while holding on to my own personal perspective, privately. When I stub my toe, and use that as motivation to slow down and love my body more. Even the diversity of life experience can provide value.

I used to be an engineer. I used to marvel at how some of the “good old boys” could go into a conference room, yell, pound the table in disagreement over an engineering design, stand and raise their voices, grab markers out of each other’s hands to write on the white boards, and then come out, shake hands, and go to lunch together!! Clearly they appreciated the need for diverse opinions! In engineering I came to understand that the most amazing designs emerged when a group of diverse individuals, from different disciplines, sat down, threw all their ideas on the table and selected from the best of these offerings. Pilots, flight attendants, manufacturers, passenger representatives and engineers all had differing needs, but as a result of their diverse input we can fly safely and comfortably in our modern planes.

Now, in my work doing readings, I hear almost every possible opinion one could dream up on almost any topic. I have learned SO much by listening to thousands of individuals with thousands of unique perspectives. I have watched the angels respond with the utmost respect for each and every one of them, often helping others understand how their point of view served their soul. I have seen the heavens encourage everyone, without exception, to be themselves, love themselves, and let others do the same.

The angels once said life is like a square dance! “Swing your partner to and fro, and if you like them do-si-do, and if you don’t, swing them off, and on you go! (I swear Dr. Suess must be one of my guides!)

So while I have my own strong opinions about most everything, I’ve learned to simply be OK with my own choices, and let others have their own. It is a much easier and more loving way to live. When I’m teaching or when people ask my opinion and I feel like sharing, I do. I no longer hold an intent to change anyone. Instead I intend only to share a point of view. Others can garner from it what is useful for them and discard the rest. It has freed me to be me, and to attract the life I want to live.

It isn’t always easy to live and let live. The idea that someone else’s choice could affect us adversely is so ingrained. Yet the truth is, vibrationally we control what we allow, or not, into our lives. The only real freedom and the only real power is to tend to our own vibe by being in integrity with our own perspectives – thinking thoughts that feel good, taking actions that feel in integrity with our spirit, and above all, being loving, kind, and compassionate beings.

Here are a few ways to weather the vast differences of opinions on the planet now.

1. Listen more. Assert less.

While the angels encourage us to share our perspectives, these days it seems that listening is a lost art. Take the time this week to truly listen to another’ point of view, especially if you disagree. Ask questions. Learn.

I tell people quite honestly, “I know what I believe but I don’t think it is my job to change you. So please tell me more. I want to understand the various perspectives. I want to learn from you.” I have learned a lot. I still know what I believe, but I feel more balanced in my understandings, and more compassionate as a result.

2. Switch judgment to discernment.

Many of you have heard this before. The angels say:

Judgment says, “No right to be!”
Discernment says, “Not right for me.”

Next time you catch yourself condemning someone or something, switch to discernment. Instead of, “How can they…” change to, “That doesn’t work for me.” Just do this internally and see how it feels to truly own the reality you wish to experience.

3. Practice Ho’oponopono

Challenge yourself to pray and send love and light to all, equally. Pray especially for those with whom you disagree.

A powerful Hawaiian practice called Ho’oponopono acknowledges that we have contributed to every vibration on the planet – those we love and those we hate. In its deeper understanding, it acknowledges that we are responsible vibrationally for allowing / creating everything we see around us. If used with sincerity, it can change your life.

A Hawaiian psychologist in the 80’s, Dr. Hew Len, used Ho’oponopono on his criminally insane patients, all of whom radically calmed and became non-violent. He did not counsel them. He simply did the Ho’oponopono process daily.

Likewise, a dear client of mine who was cheated out of a huge sum of money by a large corporation he consulted for, used this technique daily as he filed a “David and Goliath” lawsuit against the corporation. Long story short, he sent love and did the prayer daily, and miraculously, he won his case.

The common version of the Ho’oponopono prayer/affirmation is:

I am Sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
I love you

Try it with someone you vehemently disagree with. Say it with sincerity. Your soul loves the light in their soul. You are sorry you got in this negative dance with them and sorry for their pain. You ask forgiveness for anything in your vibration that contributed to theirs, and you bless them for the dance of contrast that has helped you become clear on what you now want. You may be surprised at the results!

While we all want to embrace diversity, the minute we feel threatened by someone’s conflicting opinion, we find ourselves challenged to remain lovingly steadfast in our own perspectives while allowing others the same. Creating this inner balance takes practice, but it is oh so worth the effort, and ever so freeing!