I have done a lot of letting go in my life as I’ve traveled down the road of self discovery. I had to let go of an entire identity as a “college educated engineer” in order to become a psychic. I had to let go of a stable job to have my spiritual career. I had to let go of a marriage and numerous relationships in my past in order to create a beautiful relationship with myself. And even now, even with all I teach, I still find more things within me that must be released.
Take two weeks ago for example. I know the stress of the fire in my neighborhood was the straw that broke the camel’s back so to speak in terms of creating the physical pain I was in, however I also know enough to realize that for stress to affect me that deeply something within needed addressing as well. The angels, as always, were direct. They pointed out that I had some very hurt feelings that I was trying to ignore that had begun a month ago, and that I needed to let myself be human, rant and rave and cry in private. It was true. Life was going so well and then a month ago I learned that there was some very malicious gossip going on about a friend and I. I tried not to let it bother me, but apparently it did and as I saw first hand, again, stuffing emotions leads to nasty conditions in the body. I know this. I teach it. And at times I need to learn it all over again. Dr. Peebles, the angel that comes through my friend Summer was very kind and yet very d irect. “You’re hurting my dear! Its time for Ann here to have a little bit of love and solace in her life; peace and comfort. Its time for you to say to yourself I’m sick and tired of being used, abused, distrusted and disrespected,not acknowledged, misjudged and having malcontent thrown at my face, and on and on it goes my dear. You can’t just simply shrug that stuff off because you’re a human being.” I knew he was right.
And so, since I had plenty of down time, I prayed for God to help me release every pent up frustration or tear that I had stuffed in my body over the years. Boy oh boy, did they ever! I cried into towels, not tissues! I ranted into imaginary trash cans and asked the angels to toss the upsets! And with every emotion I let go, my stomach unknotted even further. It was quite tangible and very amazing. After being in excruciating pain for over five days, suddenly my entire body was unwinding and healing in record time! Truly the soul is in charge and when we shift our energy, things can change rather rapidly.
I still had more down time since I was pretty much confined to the couch, so I looked at my life and realized I needed to release some old habits to make room for all I wanted to achieve and share with the world. Immediately I cut back on my emails, started eating meals on time without exception, and started ignoring interruptions so I could do one thing at a time. I vowed never to stuff an emotion again! And suddenly I was feeling joy again! I was inspired again! I suddenly had energy for the projects that I never seemed to get to. I had time to sit with God and my own heart each day. I started getting completely excited about the class I’m teaching in two weeks, and started getting extremely productive in my non-client hours as well. It felt so good to be in that space again! I could hardly believe that I had been in such awful pain just a week ago. Suddenly my spirit came to life again.
It wasn’t rocket science. I simply had to rid myself of some activities that were not authentically in my heart to make room for those that were. I had to rid myself of toxic emotions rather than stuffing them. I had to change a few old habits to make more room for me and my own heart in my life. These changes while obvious from the outside looking in, are not always obvious when we get stuck in the routines and ruts of our lives. I now realize I have to schedule time at least once a week, and hopefully more often, for a “spiritual inventory” to make sure I’m putting my own priorities first. And I am going to be doing a lot more letting go of what no longer serves me as I notice it in my life. It is freeing to let go of what does not work. It is hard sometimes. But I have never once seen a truly and deeply fulfilled individual who puts everyone else’s needs before their own. Instead it seems that the people who serve most in the world through joy are also the ones that are m ost true to their own hearts. I want to be that! And so it will be.
Take inventory this week. See what serves you and what does not. See if you can let go of just one thing that no longer serves you – be it a belief, a habit, an old commitment to something that no longer brings you joy, a way of being that doesn’t work, etc. Let go and see how much lighter and happier it makes you feel to be that much more authentic in your own life!