I was not expecting a newsletter on worry this Monday when I sat down to channel the newsletter. After three days in the presence of a living saint last month, I haven’t been worried about a thing lately. I’ve had plenty of cause to worry—a dear friend died, another ended up in the hospital, my family members are going through some challenges, people I know are having all sorts of health issues, and the world appears nuts. Somehow, none of it is getting to me. The discipline of focusing on the feel-good thoughts is paying off.
I didn’t worry much as a child, either. I had a strong sense of inner power that was far more likely to get me in trouble for being sassy than being worried. I somehow knew that I could figure life out regardless of challenges. I took that sense of inner power into early adulthood. Then I changed. My life changed. My marriage didn’t work out. I lost my footing, inner fire, and sense of self.
I wasn’t so confident anymore. Still, I didn’t worry much until, in my thirties, already insecure after the divorce, I dated a man who cheated on me with nearly every woman who walked into his life. I knew he was doing it. I didn’t want to know. I started to feel “lesser than.” I began to worry about my appearance, my life, my sanity, his actions, and everything else. I was helpless to change his behavior, and instead of accepting it and moving on, I wallowed in my feelings of powerlessness and sprouted seeds of worry that grew into weeds in my soul.
I finally decided to take a trip to Hawaii to clear my head, reconnect with myself, and figure out what to do about this weird mixture of love and fear. In my low-vibe state of being, I injured myself on the second day of the trip! A nasty fall (swinging from a vine that was too weak to hold me!) led to a concussion, an injured tailbone, and a rib out of place. Me being me, I opted to heal myself by hiking down into Waimea Canyon the next day. I walked slowly and deliberately down the steep trail, realizing I was walking deeply into myself again. I breathed as best I could, and my ribs started to shift back into place. The red earth beneath my feet reconnected my root chakra, and although I ached, I could feel the earth’s energy and a sense of solidness returning to my field. By the time I reached the bottom, my body hurt, but my heart felt 100% better. I was confident again. I wasn’t worried. I knew what to do.
The moment I got home, this man wanted to talk. He broke up with me on the spot. I never had to do it. My vibration had finally risen to the point of solving my problem. I wasn’t spiritually mature enough at the time to realize the beauty of my own creation! I was mad instead. Nonetheless, my sense of self had been restored, along with my confidence, and I was no longer incessantly worried.
Now and then, I’ll allow something or someone to knock me down, and in that insecure state, I start to worry about things again — people I care about, things I care about, meeting my schedules, health issues that aren’t real, you name it. That is my sign that I must stop, recalibrate, and take care of myself so I can return to a confident state of being. I can’t control anyone else’s vibration. In a higher, happier energy, however, I can soothe, help, inspire, and hold a healing vibration to assist others in attuning themselves to the conditions they seek.
Here are a few pointers to help you unwind the worry habit and return to the vibration where you are anything but powerless.
1. Dig beneath the worry to find the love
If you worry about your child, remember your love for your child.
If you worry about your job, think about the type of job you’d love and how you love feeling secure.
If you worry about the world, focus on your loving desire for a peaceful world filled with kindness for all.
If you worry about money, focus on your love for abundance and freedom.
If you worry about being on time, focus on how good it feels to arrive with room to breathe.
If you can find the love beneath the worry and focus on it as much as possible, you will shift out of powerlessness and into the vibration of being part of the solution.
2. Express your love instead of your worry
When you speak to others, don’t poison the waters of their consciousness with your worry and fear. Instead, talk to them about your love. If you worry about your child, express your love. “I love you so much. You’re so smart and capable. I know you will find the right job. You’ve always been so good at anything you try! You may not feel this way now. Few of us did, but you’ll see. I believe in you.”
Feel the difference between that and, “I’m so worried about you! Did you try this? Did you try that?” Imagine how your child will feel if you can express the love.
Likewise, you may be inclined to say often, “I’m so worried about the world,” and others will likely join in solidarity with that fear. Can you imagine how much more powerful it is to say, “Wow, it seems like the world is a mess now, but I can envision a future so far beyond this? I can imagine a future where we all get along, have more tolerance, and care about the earth. Look at the young people. They do! There are so many caring souls working so quietly on this. The nuts make the news, but so many good souls quietly do good things. I have faith in our future.”
You’ll lift others up and become part of the positive momentum toward a better world.
3. Give yourself what you need to feel more confident
I’ve had to look at myself honestly in the past. With the help of the angels, I saw the truth in this statement: Sharing your worry with those you worry about is self-serving. It says to another person, “I need you to change so I can stop worrying about you and feel better. I need you to heal my fears and reassure me that you will not catapult me into a situation where I cannot find my connection to love, self, God, and grace. I want you to be responsible for my good feelings, and please hurry up and do it.”
We know we love, but it takes honesty to see that we ask others to help us whenever we make them responsible for our worries. Think about the people who have told you they worry about you. How does that feel? Do you feel responsible for making them feel better about you? It is often hard to reassure people when you do not yet feel confident. It is challenging when people you love don’t trust you to figure out your life. It is far better to dive inward and take responsibility for our worries rather than putting that burden on others. I ask myself at times, “What if my worry came true? What do I fear? If it happened, how might I handle it constructively?” Facing the fears head-on is a powerful way to quiet them.
It is crucial to give ourselves what we need to feel better. Sometimes, getting a good coach or counselor is just the thing. Other times, we can focus on all the good in life and the good in ourselves.
4. Flip the worries to prayers
The angels constantly entreat people to flip their worries into prayers, which is a powerful way to deal with them. If you worry about something pray for what you want to see. Envision it. Imagine it. Feel it, and then imagine sending light to the situation you want. Get happy about feeling it. You have just taken charge of your energy and become a powerful force for good. Prayer, from a higher space, is powerful.
5. Imagine…
Imagine tossing your worries in a beautiful river. Let it carry them away from you as new and wonderful things flow into your life. Let the river of God’s grace bring you the solutions you have made room for by releasing your worries.
As the angels remind us, our feelings are all valid. Love is beneath them all, no matter how twisted up we get. Worrying doesn’t make you a bad person. It is a habit we learn that is culturally acceptable and often rewarded. It still doesn’t feel good. It is still rooted in fear.
There are kinder and more loving ways to feel and express our love. Do your best. Flip the worries to prayers. Breathe. Everything is going to be alright in the long run. We’ll all end up in bliss at the end of our lives. We’re all made of love, headed for love, and just trying to bring more love into this human existence. Remember to celebrate progress rather than strive for perfection 🙂
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