I have had so many changes in my life I can’t count them. I moved across the country after college to get married. I gave up a lucrative engineering career to talk to angels. I moved away from my entire life when I figured out who I really was. I lost all but one friend.
Throughout my life these cycles of change have occurred time and again as I grew. I’ve seen this with clients and friends alike. One particularly common thing that happens as we grow is that people in our lives who are unwilling to grow with us and no longer compatible with who we’ve become can fall away.
When I learned boundaries, the ones that didn’t have any got mad and left. When I grew into greater self-love, the folks that expected me to make up for their lack of it, fell away. When I grew into greater self-care, those that had demands upon my time got angry and left. I have come to humorously call these periods of intense growth and change, “Self Cleaning Cycles.” As we grow, those things and people which no longer suit us naturally leave our lives.
I’ve written about this before. In late 2009 I had a strong urge to pray to live. Psychic friends called to see if I was “OK” even though I was in great health. Other friends mysteriously started checking my car tires and told me to get new ones. I did so. A few weeks later I had two very near miss, would-have-been-fatal car accidents, if something hadn’t helped me veer suddenly out of harm’s way. I was so unnerved I got a reading with Summer Bacon – a fantastic trance medium. I didn’t say a word about what was going on.
“Congratulations,” the angel boomed out through her voice! “Before you were born you decided you’d die before your 46th birthday but you’ve changed your mind and decided to live.” I burst into tears. I knew it was true.
The following year, nearly every appliance in my house broke, a window shattered, the roof needed repair, and the list of repairs goes on and on. “What on earth is going on?” I asked the angels. “Your house thought you were going to die. The old vibrations are falling apart,” they answered! Good lord, I intentionally put a stop to that!
Likewise as I’ve grown people have left my life, often dramatically. When I quit engineering a best friend angrily demanded that I explain, “how I could leave her,” forgetting that I wasn’t dying. When I used to teach Reiki classes, another friend always got uppity with me after a class, after my vibration had changed. In my thirties, one boyfriend left angrily telling me, “I was too much work,” because I couldn’t handle excuses. (That one still makes me giggle!) I know so many of you have gone through this too. We simply become vibrationally mismatched. It’s “grow or go” here upon the earth… If you don’t grow together, it can’t last forever.
However something magical happened too. I made peace with change. Now I have delightful friends who grow with me. When someone occasionally leaves upset, I wish them well. I’ve made peace with loss (I still grieve) but it enables me to talk to people and pets much more quickly after they pass on. I made peace with the fact that cherished possessions sometimes breakand even if I grumble a little about the inconvenience, I know I’ll happily find new ones.
Change can be beautiful. Check out the stunning photo in this week’s newsletter. My friend Joyce Bealer graciously allowed me to use it. She takes the most amazing pictures of nature’s ever changing play of light, color, and texture. As she was showing me the incredible photos she took on a recent trip to New Zealand, she commented on how quickly the clouds, the water, and the light were changing into a myriad of indescribably beautiful forms. She captures ephemeral moments with an eye trained to witness the beauty in change. We can witness this too.
(Follow Joyce on her new instagram page for more of this stunning beauty! Her work is a breathtaking reminder that, in nature, change is beautiful.)
There are many times in my life where change brought me more joy than I ever dreamt possible. People left and I discovered in turning to God that I found a joy no one can ever take from me. The day the folks that originally live streamed me had computer issues was the day I was forced to figure out how to lives tream my gazes on Facebook… a change that brought me closer to so many of you in ways I couldn’t have imagined.
Change, whether we think we want it or not, brings opportunity to seek the love beneath all things, and in so doing, we gain a strength and clarity that inevitably brings better and enriches our lives.
Here are some pointers to help you embrace change
1. Make a constant effort to enjoy your life now
Change will happen. Rather than fear it and mess up your present moment, squeeze the juice out of life right here and right now! Love and enjoy the people in your life now rather than fearing their loss. Enjoy your body now rather than fearing its decline. (Fear causes decline!) Enjoy the money you have now, with gratitude, knowing a mentality of abundance will keep it coming, even after temporary periods of lack.
I was once crying as I was hugging a friend who was going to leave. “I’m going to miss you.” The angels got in my head, “You’re missing him now! You’re missing out on a moment of love!” OMG! So true. I quickly shifted to enjoy my remaining time with this person.
As you practice the art of enjoying what you can, right here and right now, you become aware that your happiness is a choice that is not dependent on external circumstances.
Loss will lose its ability to terrify you. You get to choose your joy, no matter what the outside world does.
2. Trust the journey
When change comes, embrace it as best you can. You may have to grieve. I have. You may resist and get angry. Been there. You may feel victimized. We all have fallen into that mentality at times.
However, as soon as you find a moment of peace, breathe, and remind yourself… “Trust everything. Earth is a school. Life is a dance. Change gives me opportunity to seek the greater love beneath it all.”
If you lose a job remain confident the universe is guiding you to better. If you lose money, learn from it. If you lose a dear one from the earthly plane, remind yourself that you can continue the relationship with them.. it will just take an effort to create an expanded level of consciousness. You can do it. If you get diagnosed with and illness, assume your soul is calling you to greater life and well being. Start looking forward to the changes you will make as a result of, and beyond the illness. This has healed me many times.
Change is calling you to embrace a deeper understanding of life, love, and happiness. We were born to grow.
3. Bless your changes
Look back over your life at some of the bigger changes and see how they have caused you to grow, expand, and seek a more loving experience of life… even if you had great resistance at first. Bless those who catalyzed the change, even in the most unthinkable and ungraceful ways.
As well as your inspiring people, the difficult catalysts are also the spark plugs that get you going and growing.
If you wish, pray, “Dear God, I trust this change is in my path to help me see how I have grown or to catalyze my growth. Help me embrace it with trust and faith, knowing I am loved beyond measure, guided, and that your only desire is to reveal yourself to me in ever changing ways, in ever changing forms. Help me find and feel the love beneath it all.”
Change can be scary or it can be exciting. It can create fears of doom and gloom or it can inspire a joyful sense of adventure and anticipation as we face the glorious unknown. After all, it is only in the unknown that we open ourselves to beautiful experiences that we, with our limited minds, could never even imagine.
A huge thank you to Joyce Bealer for allowing me to use her incredible photo
Follow her on Instagram at @jms_bealer_photo