Conquering fears

I don’t have anything against spiders. So when I was staying at a friend’s house and a nice furry two-inch, eight-legged girl started crawling on the kitchen counter it surprised me that I got a bit startled. I calmed down, grabbed a container and began to talk to her. “Hi Honey. You’re awfully big and you’re scaring me. Do me a favor. Jump into this container and I’ll get you out safely. We’ll both be better off!”

I held the container about four inches beneath the counter top and lo and behold, she lowered herself in. Gently I carried her outside, opened the lid, and she hopped out looking directly at me with those two big eyes sticking out of furry posts on top of her head. I wonder what on earth she was thinking! I know what my friends were thinking. They call me “the bug whisperer!”

Happily spiders are not one of my phobias from another life. I used to have a fear of icy water. The angels told me it was because I drowned as a five year old on the Titanic! I had a fear of tight things around my neck. Apparently I was choked. I used to have a fear of storms. That came from being chained to a wall in one life and left in the elements. It amuses me that I now sit in total comfort writing to thousands of loving souls all over the world. I like to joke that I’ve been roasted, toasted, sliced, and diced, and now my life is very nice! We are indeed eternal and indestructible souls!

This understanding is what gives me peace when I see such death and destruction on the news. I have huge compassion for what we go through, and yet I know that no matter how hard a life is, it is just a role in the giant masquerade ball we call life. Eventually we remember who we are as we transition back into the light.

We come to earth time and again until we remember that there is always love beneath the mask. And while we know this intellectually, until we embrace it 100% we all fall prey to fears from tie to time.

So, in honor of Halloween here are a few pointers to help you find your way out of fear, when “real” life appears scary.

1. Replace Fear with a Fantastic Fantasy

Most of you have heard that FEAR = “False Events Appear Real.” Fear is rarely about what is happening right here, right now. It is instead a scary projection on the future. You might get rejected. You might not be able to pay the bills. You might get sick. If something is in front of you here and now, you just handle it even if you’re having a biological fight/flight reaction.

So when you feel fear, remind yourself. I’m fine now. Things are manageable now. No one is hurting me this second. Now is doable. Next, think of the best possible outcome. Fear is basically a negative fantasy. Replace it with a better one.

2. Shake, Quake, or Bake

Seriously, sometimes viscerally dancing or shaking/quaking like a dog shaking water off its back after a bath is a great way to clear fear! So is exercise. If that fails “Bake” – sit in a warm place, wrap up in a warm blanket, or sip a warm drink. Physically warming your body helps release tension and relax fear.

3. Imagine how you would deal with what you fear

Fear makes you feel like you couldn’t handle a situation. In reality you’ve handled every fearful thing you’ve had to face so far. Come up with at least 3 to 5 ways you’d handle your scary situation.

4. Try a regression or other hypnosis

If you think you have unreasonable past life fears as I did a past life regression hypnosis works wonders. Even if your fears are debilitating ones from this life, hypnosis and various other reprogramming techniques like EFT, EMDR, etc. are extremely helpful in changing habitual brain patterns.

Have a Happy Halloween if you celebrate it and don’t forget that even the candy is a great metaphor… Anything scary can be counteracted with something sweet!