Being true to yourself

I am queuing this message up ahead. By the time you read it I will just be getting back from a visit with my family. My parents turned 80 this year and I went back east for my mom’s birthday. I’m sure I’ll have more to share. I know in advance as I write this that it will be a beautiful visit.

It was not always this way. I didn’t drink, party, or sleep around when I was young. Instead, I had a “big mouth.” I spoke up. I rebelled with quiet stubbornness when I didn’t like what was being said. I tried to remain true to my inner compass throughout the early years, but rarely with grace.

When it came time to embark on my adult life I couldn’t wait. Boarding the plane after college to move permanently to Phoenix, I was completely excited about the new life ahead of me. My parents felt the loss of their child. I felt freedom.

I’ll never forget a pivotal moment in my relationship with my mom a few years later. My folks had come out to visit and I was still a pretty stubbornly opinionated 26 year old. I wanted to show my parents a good time. My mom wanted to be involved in every little last thing I did from meal prep to how I should handle the details of my life. Outwardly, I tolerated her constant need to be needed while inwardly going nuts. She tolerated my stand-offishness while secretly wanting to cry. We had no idea about the truth of how the other one felt until…

As she was leaving she started to cry. Inwardly I groaned. More drama.“What did I do?” I asked impatiently. She blurted out, “When you left home, I felt like you wanted to get away from us.” Uncensored I blurted out, “I did! You want me to be you! I’m not. I’m me. I love you, but we’re different.” “I love you too,” she blurted out, sniffling. “I don’t want you to be me. I’m sorry. I never meant to do that to you. That’s what my mom did to me.”

The light of understanding was melting both of our hearts. By this time I was bawling. “I love you too! I adore you. I just want you to love me as I am. You’re my mom. I want my mother to love me as I am. I know I’m different.” She cried. I cried. We hugged, and cried, and hugged and cried some more. My husband and dad who had been talking came in, took one look at us, and left.

Finally, tears spent, we started laughing. “You are such a pain,” she joked with me. I giggled, face all wet, and laughed. “You too.” “I love you.” “I love you more.”

We have had the most loving and beautiful relationship ever since. We couldn’t have found this beauty until we became true to ourselves and willing to share our hearts. My dad and I too, now share freely with respect to each other’s paradigms and have found a great love, whereas there was only head-butting in the past. He is a brilliant scientist, and I’m a mystic. We come from different paradigms, but now that we remain true to ourselves, we actually enhance each other’s understandings of life.

It hasn’t always been easy to remain true to myself in a world that rewards agreement and often judges, misunderstands, and even punishes us for differing views. I think many of us have been crucified by people who wouldn’t take the time to get to know us, judged for our beliefs, and made wrong by those who simply live in different realities.

Nonetheless, it is worth risking the displeasure of others to remain true to yourself, because then and only then, does your life become your own. Then, true healing, true intimacy, and truly community seem to find their way to you… easily, naturally, and in a way that honors your spirit.

Here are some pointers this week to help you remain true to yourself…

1. Take time to get to know yourself

This may sound odd, but most of us are the products of our upbringing. We accept things about ourselves as fact, or out of habit, when in fact they may not be true. I thought I was cut out for science until I started to explore my interests and discovered I was more of a creative soul and a mystic. That was a shock to discover. For decades I had accepted a truth that wasn’t my own.

Ask yourself, “Do I like what I’m doing? What might I enjoy more? Do I like my environment? What might I like more? Do I enjoy the people whose company I keep? What characteristics or crowds might I enjoy more? Are there things I secretly with to explore?”

The most important relationship we will ever have is with ourselves. Take time every now and then to get to know yourself more deeply.

2. Share your perspectives without need for agreement

Many people fear conflict. In doing so they withhold their perspectives, get upset, and then inspire conflict.

Instead, far better to share your perspective in a non-pushy, kind and loving way, and then let the cards fall where they may. When we hold our feelings back or conversely, need others to agree, they sense the energy and push back or withdraw.

When we simply share our hearts with love, most souls will soften and listen much more intently.

For example, often the angels will say in readings, “We see exactly how you see this situation, but may we give you our perspective?” Almost always people say yes, and then the angels lovingly explain how they see things from heaven. We all expand and grow.

Don’t be afraid to share your heart. Some will love it. Some will not. I share passionately what I feel and believe quite freely but I do so without any need to be “right.”

Disagreement does not diminish or invalidate your perspective.

3. Do only what you are truly inspired to do

Other than commitments you have already made, do only what you are inspired to do.

Next, start to make small changes to change the current commitments that don’t work for you. If you don’t like your job, start manifesting a new one. If you don’t enjoy doing something with your spouse, either do it because you love them (loving is always true to you!) or renegotiate.

This aren’t always quick or easy adjustments, but ultimately by seeking to do more and more of what inspires you, you become a more powerful, happy, person and more capable of helping those you love.

Being true to yourself will sort out who and what belongs in your life, but ultimately you will be left with a life you absolutely fit and absolutely love!

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By |2018-10-08T18:25:52+00:00October 27th, 2018|Messages from Ann|

About the Author:

Ann Albers is a popular Author, Spiritual Instructor, Angel Communicator, & Modern Mystic. Enjoy her free weekly newsletter, "Messages from Ann & the Angels," her Internet TV show, Live Events, Books, CDs, Recipes, Poetry, Photographs, and more at! Ann delights in helping you create a heavenly life on earth!

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