I remember my first Christmas alone. I had left my marriage, my home, my dogs and my job earlier in the year. I had spent long enough feeling sorry for myself in months prior and was determined to enjoy the holidays. I decorated with love, baked cookies to share with everyone I knew, and invited friends over for Christmas eve.

Nonetheless when I woke up alone on Christmas day I started to slip into a wallowing bout of self-pity. As the angels like to say, those thoughts, didn’t “serve my joy.” I realized quickly that my expectations were making me miserable. I started to choose different thoughts…

“What if I didn’t worry about doing Christmas the way I’d always done it? What would I do for fun if I were truly in the moment.” Suddenly I realized I really wanted to be outdoors. I wanted to go for a hike. I threw on my hiking boots and some warm clothing and hopped in the car. The streets were quiet. I knew that in most of the houses families sat gathered in love. My family was 3000 miles away. Still, determined to have a good day, although not traditional, I drove to Camelback Mountain in the center of Phoenix, locked the car, and proceeded to climb.

To my surprise many others had the same idea. Smiling souls greeted me on the trail and wished me Merry Christmas. There was a festive atmosphere on the mountain. Although I was huffing and puffing when I reached the top, I couldn’t help but smile! It was a holiday party with family I didn’t even know I had! Everyone was singing, happy, sharing treats, and enjoying the beautiful day. We may have been a diverse crowd but we shared our love of nature, the crisp air and the holiday spirit.

It got even better. A group of students reached the top, and among them was a Scottish Exchange student dressed in a kilt full regalia, carrying his bagpipes! I realized I hadn’t lived fully until I heard “We Wish you a Merry Christmas” on bagpipes! Seriously, I was thrilled! What a treat! There was no way I would have enjoyed such diversity and love sitting at home feeling sorry for myself.

Now my holidays give me great joy. Instead of waiting for others and the outside world to create the season I love, I do my best to create it for others. My home is warm, welcoming, and festive. My kitchen smells like cinnamon and spice. Although we’ve cut way back on presents, my friends and I enjoy each others’ Presence thoroughly. My family and I facetime. It is a truly blissful time of year even with long hours and a lot to do.

The power of our mind to choose better thoughts is one of the biggest blessings we have. A single thought can fill you with joy or bring you down. A thought can relax your body and allow you to breathe, or make your heart beat with anxiety. A thought can block us from experiencing the angels love or open us to receive an outpouring of heavenly bliss…


Here are some pointers to help you choose thoughts that bring you joy…

1. Take Regular Moments of Appreciation

Set a timer in your home or on your phone and every time it rings, stop, breathe, and consciously look for three things to appreciate right here and now. Soon it will become habit to look for the good!

2. Remember a good time

Ask yourself randomly, “What is one happy memory?” See what shows up. Revel in the good feelings. Feel your body relax. The minute your mind starts to wander and say, “Yes but its gone…” refocus on the good feeling. With time you will be able to look back in life and see only goodness and growth.

3. Anticipate the best

Think of something you want to experience. How will it feel? Can you feel your happy future now? If so you have totally tuned into it in your present and you are actually “mailing yourself” a present in the future by creating it!


While it may seem that our thoughts are a runaway train and our traditions are on auto-pilot, choice is a powerful tool for tuning into all that is good and beautiful. Pick up those good memories. Keep shifting away from unhappy thoughts, one at at time, and soon you’ll train your brain to focus on the vibration of joy!

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