I got the email three weeks ago. “My uncle is in the hospital and may be ready to leave. Can you check in on him…” I was in between clients, but quickly tuned into Uncle D. “Are you going to live?” I asked. “Not sure yet,” came the answer. “Ask me later.” I checked in after work. “I’m leaving but have to give the family a little time,” he replied. He was in a coma.
My friend confirmed what I felt. He asked me if he could arrange a conference call with his sister to talk to Uncle D, who was at this time, expanded out of his body in the hospital room. What followed was an incredible two and a half hour conversation with a beautiful soul in transition.
Uncle D explained that once he realized “he’d be a vegetable” the rest of his life, he decided to leave. He told us he had a choice. He was currently experiencing himself as a consciousness, expanded way beyond his body, and feeling a freedom he had never felt on earth. He could see into the past and future. He knew his wife would have a hard time but that she’d be OK.
He gave us clear advice on how to help his kids deal with his transition. He detailed how each would feel and what they’d need. He joked about feeling the presence of his relatives in heaven, hearing them, sensing them, but not seeing them yet. He told us “the light” was right there and he was using every ounce of willpower not to let go and go into it because it felt so good. He was waiting till his sister arrived before he let go, but it wasn’t easy to resist the love that was calling him home.
He explained that he could see, feel, and understand everyone he loved all at once, no matter where they were. The amazing thing was, when we were talking to him, so could we.
We started to feel as he did. My friend was driving home in one state. His sister was in her home in another. Uncle D was in the hospital, and I was on the couch in Arizona far away. Separated by miles, we felt no separation whatsoever. We were all aware of our individual realities and yet we felt as if we were completely with one another in a space outside of normal space and time.
In my former engineering life, we’d say that we become “parallel processors!”
We finally ended the call as my energy waned. Uncle D was thrilled to share his joy and freedom. My friend and his sister were delighted to hear it at a time which otherwise would have been terribly sad. I was in awe. As promised, he waited until his sister reached the hospital and quietly, joyfuly gave in to the love calling him home.
These types of conversations have comforted me, educated me, and given me great joy over the years. Some spirits give me details some don’t, but they’ve all convinced me, beyond a shadow of doubt, that we are so much more than these bodies.
I know we will meet all our dear ones again I know there is no loss, only a never ending expansion into our understandings of love.
Here are a few pointers to help your loved ones in spirit learn to connect with you:
1. Set the rules
When you start dealing with the spirit world, set clear intentions. We have free will and they must respect that. I’ve learned the hard way over the years, so now you can learn it easily! Simply say a little prayer before attempting contact:
Only spirits of light and love are allowed around me and to be in communication with me.
Or if you like ask only for the specific person. For example,
Only grandma and my angels are allowed to be around me and to be in communication with me.
2. Sit with spirit
Set aside a little time each week or every few days – only 1-2 minutes maximum. That’s about how long most people can hold a focus without getting frustrated. It is best to have a schedule and do it at the same time each day or week (e.g., Tuesdays and Thursdays at 7pm). Tell the spirit you are trying to connect with your schedule. That way they can make you a priority during those times.
For just these few minutes, set aside sadness and grief and simply focus on your love for them – not your longing, not your regrets, not guilt – just love. Feel it expand in your heart. Then wait. Pay attention to your body, your mind, your emotions. Notice any different feelings, like heat, tingling, coolness, a pitter patter in your heart or an expanded feeling. See if you see colors through your closed eyes, or have sudden memories pop in.
Just be the observer.
3. Give feedback and repeat
Give your spirit feedback. Even if you feel nothing, say so. You can say it out loud or internally. “I feel nothing. I feel a little heat. I think I felt a tingle. I am seeing light.” The after a minute or two, stop. Wait till next time and repeat.
It is the job of your dear one in spirit to figure out how to shift their energy to reach you. By giving them feedback, they learn how their energy is affecting you in the body. They can then go back, work with their angels and guides and make adjustments. Some spirits get through instantly. Some take months to figure it out. It is a matter of them learning how to match your energy and focus long enough for you to feel it.
It is not your job to do anything but love, notice and give feedback then repeat!
If you keep this up eventually your loved one will figure out how to get through. It is best to work with one at a time at first.
It took my grandpa months to connect with me this way, after his passing, but now every time I sit still I feel my right hand heat up, as he holds it. I love him so much it is a huge comfort. Some spirits come with an embracing warmth, a feeling in the heat, a fragrance, a song in your head, etc. You never know what they’ll choose to be their “calling card.” Just roll with it until one signal or sign becomes consistent.
Have fun with this. As the angels like to say, “There is no death… only doorways through eternity.”