There is life after death.  I have no doubt after tuning in and talking to the spirits of those who have crossed over. When I first began to detect the presence of those spirits, I questioned my sanity. I would get a vague notion that there was someone in the room, much like you feel a person walking up from behind you. In time, I began to get a sense of whether or not the spirit was male or female and began to receive information about the type of relationship this soul had with my clients.

When I get a strong connection with someone in spirit, they put words, pictures, and whole sentences in my mind. They have shown me what it is like to die. They’ve gifted me beautiful visions of heaven. And they’ve given great insight into the nature of life as well.

We are souls before birth and after death. Your soul is your essence that exists with or without your body. The soul is the part of you that has never forgotten its connection with the Divine. When we die only the body dies. The soul is eternal and continues to exist in other realms.

The dying process is really amazing. So many spirits have taken me through it vicariously I can honestly say that there is nothing to fear. In the case of sudden deaths, such as accident or heart attack, there is often very little pain. The person feels a twinge or a jolt and then the spirit often separates prior to feeling any further discomfort. There is sometimes a slight vertigo or a lift-off feeling and then the person often wonders at the commotion around them because they don’t always realize that they have died!

Sometimes they come to this realization when they see their angels or loved ones in spirit around them. At other times, they are simply given a knowing. Still others have told me they realized they were dead only when they saw their body. They are all  amazed at how alive they looked and felt. The spirit might hang around the family or the body for a short time, typically less than three days before officially “crossing over,” as they call it.

“Crossing over” usually involves some wonderfully blissful experience of floating or traveling through a healing, warm light. Often this is described as a tunnel-experience, but some souls have shown me that they floated through colorful clouds, or passed in and out of rainbows. It seems to vary with the individual. Next the spirit finds him or herself in some version of “heaven.” This may be a beautiful place that they recognize from earth, a childhood home, a place they always longed to visit or somewhere else that is indescribably beautiful.

For souls who were bedridden and died in their sleep, they often wake up in what I call a “bed and breakfast hospital” in heaven! They have shown me scenes of feather beds in rooms with windows overlooking beautiful vistas. This scenario allows them to become accustomed to the idea that they have passed in a very gentle and loving manner.

Once the soul realizes he or she is dead, they are often filled with awe and wonder at the experience of heaven. Far from being the harp and trumpet scenario of my upbringing, heaven seems to be a replica of an earthly paradise. In that realm, thought creates. You can build a whole house simply by holding the idea in your mind with focus. You can change your appearance to be any age, or anything at all, but most people choose to remain close to their favorite age here on earth. They tell me that you will recognize their spirit when you cross over, no matter what they look like!

Many souls decide to rest and enjoy the best heaven has to offer for years and years after they cross. Some souls decide to create ‘jobs’ in heaven, such as greeting the newly deceased, taking care of pets or children who die before their owners, or perhaps praying for a certain group of people or a situation on earth. For example, one young man who passed early in life joined a group of young people in heaven who were sending positive energy and prayers to the middle east to avert wars. Another young many who recovered in heaven after committing suicide told me that he is “sponsoring” a young man here on earth, that is, serving as a guide so this young man doesn’t have to create a disaster in his life too. I have been amazed at the creativity and diversity up there.

And where exactly is “up there?” Technically speaking, heaven is simply a different dimension of band of frequencies, superimposed on our reality! Just like there are radio and television waves passing through you and your house at this moment, there are different frequencies or realities existing all at once! Thank goodness we are not “receivers” for all of them or it would get quite confusing! However, we can learn to tune into and work with our deceased loved ones.

If you have lost someone you love, realize that it may be more difficult for them to get your attention if you are still grieving and in pain. Turbulent emotions create psychic static and although your loved ones are there, you might not be able to hear them. Wait until you feel peaceful and then try the following:

• Create some quiet time for yourself every day. Listen to soothing music, meditate, or take a walk. Still your mind.
• Sit down and shut your eyes once you are peaceful. Imagine your loved one sitting across from you. Mentally ask a question or simply ask them what they’d like to tell you today.
• Wait. Trust the first thing that comes to mind, either words, images, or just a quick thought. Do not edit and do not doubt. You will probably think you are making these things up until one day when you receive information you could not have known otherwise. Practice.

Be aware that some days you will have a clearer connection than others. On the days when you can’t connect, don’t assume your loved one isn’t there. Just as there are days when the traffic pollution is worse than others, there are days when the emotional pollution on the planet is worse than others. On these days, it requires greater stillness of mind to get a good connection.

Your loved ones want to help you after they pass on. You are not distracting them from enjoying their heavenly life by asking for their assistance. Time is different “up there.” They seem to have time to enjoy the afterlife and to help us as well. They are not judging you and they don’t spy on you, but they will definitely be a loving presence by your side.

You may perceive a change in their energy after some time. Eventually souls decide that they have enjoyed enough of an earthly paradise and they choose to go completely back to their spiritual essence. In that space, they know themselves to be connected to everyone and everything — a part of the Divine essence, and yet they still maintain their individuality. At this stage, they feel much like an angel when you perceive them–wise, loving, and unconditionally accepting of your choices.

Is my loved one upset with me? I am often asked this question. If you had unresolved issues with your loved one before they passed, or if you were not able to be there when they died, or attend their funeral, please rest assured that they are not upset. After death the soul sees things from a higher perspective and wants to give only love to the people who are remaining on earth. Forgiveness is automatic and easy.

Do they know how much I love them? Without question, the answer is “Yes!” After death the soul goes through a “life review” in which they see how their actions affected people either positively or negatively. They understand what motivated them and the others, and they understand how people felt about them. They know how much you love them, and they are very aware of how much you miss them.

What happens to “bad” people? Although no soul is truly bad, the actions taken by the person on earth may be very damaging. So many times I have been contacted by those in spirit who were very emotional and wanted to apologize to their children or loved ones for the damage they caused in their lives. When a soul undergoes his or her life review, they knows intimately the hurt he or she has caused others, and in this space of love, there is a strong desire to make things right.

In some extreme cases, a soul must go through what I call “Angel Therapy” after death in order to be able to forgive themselves. I see this often with those who have been severely abusive to others. These spirits do not tend to hang around the people they have harmed. Instead they first work on themselves and later are inclined to do some form of heavenly service (i.e., praying for or guiding others on earth who still have time to change). In every case there is forgiveness and there is no lasting hell.

What about suicides? Where do they go? I have talked to several spirits who have committed suicide. I have to admit the initial experience of the afterlife is not always pleasant for these people. They realize what they’ve done almost instantly and are often horrified at the sudden awakening and realization that they’ve wasted a life. These people need our prayers. Divine grace will always intervene, but the more we pray for them the quicker they will heal on the “other side” and accept love back into their hearts. The minute they do they begin the process of understanding their lives, forgiving themselves, and working to help the ones they left behind.

I’ll never forget on young man I tuned into. He showed me his death experience rather graphically and then his spirit clung to me like a scared child. For three days after his living brother’s session with me he was plastered to me, in fear. I even got sick from all the fear. I prayed for him and encouraged his family to do the same and asked the angels to help him heal. In six months when another one of his relatives came to see me the young man in spirit was significantly better. He had realized that he needed to forgive himself and was deeply sorry for the pain he’d caused. A year later, he was completely healed and working with his loved ones. This has been a very moving process to ‘watch’ and has convinced me that hell is only something in our minds that we create when we don’t believe we are worthy of love.

Say more about hell. Hell is a state of mind in which we believe ourselves unworthy of love. We can be in hell either here on earth or in the afterlife. Many of us have had experiences of the “dark night of the soul” which feels like a kind of hell–times when we forget that we are supported and unconditionally loved by God. There is no hell created by judgment or damnation. If a soul in serious self-hatred passes over they often spend some time in a self-created hell. They see what they’ve done. They have regrets, and they do not yet allow love into their hearts. Like rays of sunlight filtering into a dark room, they tell me, the angels and their loved ones on earth send prayers. They notice one of these rays of light and in that instant they are free. They see the help available, they begin to receive the love, and then they are out of their self-created hell.

We on earth have much to learn from this. We are all worthy of love, no matter what we have done. All we have to do is forgive ourselves and make amends. This is spiritual truth. And as soon as we do, we begin creating heaven here on earth. This is our job…to love ourselves and then others. When we do this we are not so far from those who have crossed before us.

What about marriage in heaven? What if a loved one dies before me? Is it ok to remarry? If a spouse dies before the other, they often encourage the person remaining to remarry or find a new partner. They want us to experience as much love on earth as they are experiencing in heaven. In fact, they often work with the angels to bring a new love into the life of the one remaining on earth. There is no jealousy in heaven, only love. We often have a harder time with this notion than they do.

In heaven, the “rules” are different. You may choose to live with a partner but your heart holds love for everyone. There is no conflict in feeling love for all souls in heaven. Here on earth we have human weakness and limitations. In the higher realms we great along easily and graciously with all souls.

What if I don’t want to see someone after I die? They will honor your free will decision, but chances are likely you will be in a space of forgiveness after death.

What happens to children and people who die young? They may choose to remain in heaven and grow much like they would have here. Or they may choose to come back into your family at some point in the future (often the case with abortions or miscarriages). Often, they choose to remain in heaven and serve as the family angel. In every case I’ve encountered they are happy and well taken care of.

What about pets? Pets often show up in spirit around their previous earthly owners! Pets live on after death, just like we do. They are happy, well taken care of and not at all concerned about the fact that they’re no longer here on earth. Animals do not look at death as we do. They think of it as a natural process and tend not to resist when it is their time. They quickly forget any suffering that occurred before they left. Many times, they’ll come back to the owner later as a new pet.

Why are my lights blinking!? What are they trying to tell me? Your loved ones may be good electricians on the other side! They may turn your lights on and off, blink your TV, start up an electronic child’s toy, or cause the phone to beep. Their signals may be more subtle such as motivating you to turn on the radio when your song comes on or drawing your attention to something that reminds you of them. There are so many ways they can let you know they are around. And what are they trying to tell you? Most likely they just want to let you know they’re alright and that they love you!

How can I learn more? If you’d like to learn more about life after death, I’ve created two CDs to assist you, one informational, and one designed to help you heal and communicate after the death of a loved one. Links are on this page.

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In my CD “Life After Death” we have meditations that have helped many connect with their loved ones who had transitioned. For now you can do a very simple exercise, that will begin to help you on your journey of connecting with your dear one.

Pick a time where you will regularly commit five minutes to “sit” with spirit.

Pick one loved one that you would like to start connecting with, preferably someone you are familiar with although you can try this with anyone throughout history.

• At the time you choose, sit in a quiet space. Be comfortable. Breathe as slowly and deeply as you can.
• State your intention, “Dear _____, Please come and give me a hug in spirit. Let us work together so I can eventually feel and perceive your presence in my life.”
• Then sit, breathe, and wait. Give your loved one feedback. You might tell them “I feel nothing.” “I feel heat.” “I feel tingles.” “I feel my heart expanding or pounding a little faster.” “I tickle.”  They are going to have to figure out on their end, how to tune their energy so you feel something. Your only job is to be present, see what you feel, and let them know… even if it’s nothing for now.
• If you don’t feel anything or don’t feel much, stop after 3-5 minutes again and don’t worry. Just try again the next time. They are learning how to reach you and  you are likely to get frustrated if you sit more than that without an effect 🙂  Just repeat the process the next time.
• When you start to feel them, continue to give them feedback, and eventually just relax and sit in their energy enjoying a strengthening of your newfound reconnection.

For some people there will be a feeling the very first try, others take months! On your end, your only job is to remain peaceful and observant, and report to them what you feel or don’t. They are in spirit and will be working to figure out how to attune their energy to reach you. In time, this can become a blissful experience of communion.